Relationship - 1 card Tarot reading.

01 As always

Shuffle the deck
3 times.


Draw a single card:

Knight of Wands: Meanings I found.
This card is usually chosen for a light complexioned young man.
Discord
Jealous friend or love
delayed journeyperson is not yet fully invested in the relationshipsomeone who has been hurt in the past and as a result of this pain, does not trust love
always on the verge of moving on
stress and minor arguments in an existing relationship
Try to get to the bottom of what is really happening


My interpretation.
My past is still holding me back and not fully allowing my to find my way though the discord. I have a hard time coping with situations that remind me of previous situations and therefor jump to conclusions. I still fear that I will make the same mistakes I have made in the past. A fear of sharing my feelings for fear of not being listened to is holding me back... I need to overcome this.




Reading interpretation from multiple sources.
Mastering The Tarot - Book by Eden Gray
http://www.keen.com/CommunityServer/UserBlogPosts/crowfeather/Knight-of-Wands--Flaky-and-Non-committal/440986.aspx
http://www.psychic-revelation.com/reference/q_t/tarot/tarot_cards/wands_knight_reversed.html

December - Week 1

01 This week has been an interesting one. I feel like it has lasted way longer than  humanly possible. Then again, I also feel like it has passed by in a blur which I am barley able to remember.

Sunday: 

Cleaned my garage some more with my mom. 

Brought 12 boxes to goodwill.

Filled my Jeep with 45 flattened boxes

Saw my jeep in the garage for the first time since moving in (Nov 2009)

Went shopping with my sister Nancy.

Went to Michaels, finished getting craft supplies.

Tuesday:

Saw Dessa @ 7th Street Entry.  with Jake

Small Venue.

 LOVED HER as always.

Wednesday:

LAZY Day off!

Tomorrow: Saturday

Work and then...

WATCH MY NEPHEWS!
I am excited.

This means an entire evening of playing video games.

prettymuch, getting to pretend I am about age 10 again.

:LOVE IT:

Any days that aren't mentioned... means I was at work...

p.s. there are rumors... and all will be revealed soon

Christmas Present # 1 - Wrapped

01
So, I just finished making my tree skirt. Charlie brown seemed like a good choice for fabric. I also finished my Mom's gift and it is the first gift under my tree! I am so excited to watch it fill up with the gifts I have bought and made for the people that I care the most about!

I love the holidays!




p.s. My tattoo is almost healed, Pictures to be posted soon! Promise :)

Pawprints on my Heart - Tattoo

01

Tomorrow I will be adding another tattoo to my body. The paw prints of my three little room mates. Tigger, Feather and Lady Nova. I want them to forever sit close to my heart so they will be permanently placed on my inner left arm, close to my heart. I will post pictures tomorrow afternoon and share my newest art with you.

Here are the prints that I will be basing my tattoo on. 

Christmas preparations are under way

01

I have been doing a lot of crafting this last week. I have most of my gifts for my family started. Of course I can't post about them, for that would mean risking that they would find out what they are getting before christmas morning. I can say though that I have been tring lots of new mediums. These experiments have been a lot of fun.

Today I got my first big christmas tree. Thank you Becky and Megan, you have helped me to make my home feel cozy and warm. I realized though that I need many more ornaments to make it as full as our family tree always was when I was growing up.

Well I have a headache and am about to fall asleep so that is all for tonight. I will post pictures of my decorated house tomorrow. Goodnight whomever may be reading this.

The color yellow-self analysis

01

I seem to have a fascination with the color yellow recently, the last few days to be specific. It intrigues me as to why this may be. Colors are huge tells into what a person is feeling, whether knowingly or subconsciously. I am not sure which of these two categories my intrigue falls under. I am aware off the color itself, and aware of implications behind said color. The question remains , what does this represent in my life?

Inspired Necklace.

01 I was in a crafting mood today. It always helps me to fight off a headache. I found this tutorial a couple days ago, and fell in love, I had to make my own.

Here is my rendition of the tutorial. I LOVE how it turned out. The final touch of the rose and the butterfly are my favorite. I am probably going to make a couple more of these when i find the right trinkets to decorate them with.



Final Price Breakdown:
Yellow Cotton Scarf - $3 from Practical Goods on Randolf Avenue
Silver Chain$3.99
Tarnished Chain $3.99
Tassel/Vine $3.99

$15 spent on new items.

Awesome part though, I went to Joann fabrics today to get the chain and tassel for this piece, and picked up a couple other things as well. I bought a storage unite for my paint and drawing supplies, and some non-toxic washable ink pads to use for paw printing the kitties for my next tattoo. The original price for the storage unit was $34.99. I had a 40% off coupon AND  a $10 off coupon. For all the chains, ink, storage unit and a zipper to fix my old boot. I paid $34.13  so in theory I paid for the storage container and EVERYTHING ELSE WAS FREE! Love saving almost 50%

Let it snow!

01

Today, in Minnesota, we got our first real snow if this season we call winter. Yes, technically out is still fall, but all the same.
Personally I have been looking forward to the snow. The snow means a couple specific things to me.
1. I am getting my jeep back from my mom, yay for being tall on the road again!
2. Sledding, hopefully more than last year. My sled will be living in my jeep.
3. Snowy, crisp clean wintery photographs. I have never done a lot of winter photography, so this yeast I am pushing myself to do more.
Well I leave you with a snowy picture tonight. I took it because it reminds me if the many times I saw my friend Cole's bike coated in snow in the ritz parking lot.

#30daysofphotos

01

This is my new challenge. Some of these photos may be shot with film, so it may take a bit of extra time to get them posted, but look out world here comes 30daysofphotos Madi Style.

Last words for the evening.

01 I have said my goodnights and closed my chat windows. It is now time for me to reflect.

Tonight I made plans to host a dinner party, a post thanksgiving potluck to be exact. I have invited my favorite people, and their significant others to come and share food and good company. I truly hope that most everyone can come. My house, though tiny, can hopefully support as many friendly faces as I would like to see.
It is nice to actually have my house clean enough that I am ok with sending out invites for an evening such as the one to follow.
I am excited.

Yesterday Emily, Jake's sister, and I went walking.  It was really nice and relaxing. It is always nice to have someone to talk with. I am really glad that we get along so well. We are alike in the way that words fascinate us. We both stopped dead and silent in our tracks to read the following words on the sidewalk...



That is really all the reflecting that I care to do for tonight...

Thought of the day: Fall in love with the one you love, every day!

<3

post 448/500

Vintage Glasses, Yay or Nay? - Poll

01 I Found these in my garage, I am having a bit of a love, but do I love them enough relationship. I feel like they could be fun to wear every so often, but I am not sure if they could fit my every day lifestyle... maybe once I get contacts again I can wear them with those... sounds like a much cheaper option than new lenses for these babies. What do you think??

Clean, Clean and Clean some more...

01

Today was the third attempt at cleaning my garage. 

The mess of boxes that were piled and repiled are finally piled much more successfully.

Purchased  8 new Plastic bins

Emptied over 25 boxes

12 boxes of give away.

One or two more days and I should HOPEFULLY be able to get my car parked in the garage!

The after... Believe it or not.

And finally... there weren't many casualties today... except for one little plastic box of photos.

They had at one point in time become wet. The negatives, in sleeves, completely demolished. Every photo in the box, beyond recognition. That was a hard moment for me. It will make me archive my photos better. Which I suppose is something that I should have been doing all along, being a photographer and all! The only other casualties of the garage have been a bag of clothing that got wet, and some stuffed animals that suffered the same fate. Because of this I am slowly converting ALL of the boxes to big hefty plastic bins. I hope that I don't have any other damage during this process.

The Photos Horrible fate:

And to end on a happy note, I found a box of things that belonged to my dad... Including his YODA! 

When life becomes too cryptic

01 I have been reading old blog posts, using the excuse of "making sure everything is labeled correctly." In reality though I am reminiscing in that way I sometimes do. It has struck me that I at times become too cryptic. You ask how I have come to this realization... I don't even know what some of my own writing means anymore... like The Red Tie from February 12th of this year. I have no clear remembrance of who this is about or what even it is referring to. Maybe I should keep a separate journal to keep track of what my cryptic blog posts mean to me. Or possibly, it may be better to leave things alone. I know that sometimes I just write to get things out of my head, so maybe it is better to not be able to relive those memories.

Like the butterfly - Poem

01

Still a silent butterfly,
In the back of your rushing mind.
slowly fluttering...
In the slow rhythm that memories make.

In the back of your rushing mind,
A feeling will linger,
Reminding you of the butterfly.

Slowly fluttering...
Waiting patiently...
to be freed from beneath the glass.

In the slow rhythm that memories make,
The beat will grow.
One day you will hear the melody.

Goal Setting - Personal Challenge

01
So on a different note,  at the beginning of the year I set a goal for myself with this blog. My goal was the equivalent of one post per day.

as of this post I am  at 173/365 which is equal to 47%    

In my opinion that is not very close... that is 192 posts away from my goal.  

There are only 53 days left in the year... which would mean 3.5 posts per day...   

Therefore I have set a new goal, I would like to reach 500 posts total in my blog.

as of this post I am at 442/500 which is 88% of goal.

58 posts to go, and 53 days in which to write them, I think I can do that.  

When I successfully complete this goal it will put me at 63% of my original goal, not quite hitting it, but not as far away as I am now.

Thanks for reading.

Apologies to the Past

01 Yesterday was more emotionally taxing than I had ever expected it to become. I have lost a friend who means a lot me. He helped me to get through more rough times than he knows. It hurts to be lied to and then pushed away. A single lie, or evasion of the truth can make an entire situation completely different. On this note, I have some apologies to make, well to make again....  and a couple of thank yous to say to the people that even though they are not active in my life anymore, still have never fully disappeared.

We were not doing anything wrong by trying to be friends, at least not on my side. If you had a different agenda, then maybe it is best that this attempt at friendship failed. I am sorry that timing is always bad between us. I wish our friendship could have survived.

I am sorry that my behaviors left us not being able to even be friends. I never knew how to act around you after things ended. Our friendship was built and intertwined with our relationship and without one, I guess I was at a loss for how to go about the other. I am truly sorry that I lost you as a friend, if you ever want to try again I am here.

We should never have walked the path that we did, because in the end it destroyed us. If I could trade the memories of every moment we shared for a new friendship with you, I think I would do it. You are a person who helped me learn who I was and what I wanted from life, I thank you for that and just wish you were still around to see what I have made of myself. I think you would be proud of me.

I am sorry I wasn't able to be upfront with you about everything. I am sorry that you got hurt in the rush of everything else. I never wanted to break your heart, then again I suppose that is never the intent going into a relationship. Of these four apologies, I am glad that we are still friends. So thank you for still being around and for not hating me so much that we cant be friends.

Schedule is in - Winter 2012 Aii

01 I am nervous and excited to go back to school in January. I just got my schedule complete, Thanks Bavi for doing it over email with me, much appreciated. Without further adu,

* CA2430       UG96 C2 R    Intro to Video   4.0  LL 08:00p-10:50p -M-----   

                                              0.0  LL 08:00p-10:50p ---W---   

 * GE4455       UG96 E2 R    Literature       4.0  LC 06:00p-07:50p -M-----

                                              0.0  LC 06:00p-07:50p ---W---

* PH3410       UG96 H1 R    Photographic Ess 4.0  LL 08:00a-10:50a --T----

                                              0.0  LL 08:00a-10:50a ----R--

* DM2490       UG96 D2 R    Project Manageme 4.0  LL 11:00a-12:50p --T----

                                              0.0  LL 11:00a-12:50p ----R—

Hope to see some familiar faces in my classes!

Reorganizing and Redecorating

01 I have slowly begun the process of reorganizing my house. In the process of organizing I am doing a little redecorating as well. I redid the setup on top of my TV cabinet today. I am really happy with it. It features artwork by Hannah Rose and Tyler Chambers. Pictures of Jake and I being our dorky selves create the focal point in the center. It makes me smile every time every time that I look at it. I drew out a rough idea of this on paper the other day, which helped a lot in my motivation to actually get it done. Thanks paper!

The Idea:

The Final Product:

What is Left? - Poem

01

What is Left?

Still entertaining the thoughts
of a time not so long ago
like re watching the past 

as it plays in slow motion
behind these closed eyes
visions betray me.

Entranced, enchanted, enthralled.

But I must let go.
I wont forget you.
For now I must let this fade.
Learn to pass the time with older memories
of a friendship that we once shared,
to see what is left amongst the ruins
of a tattered lovestory.

The lace chair, the beginning - DIY PROJECT

01

So I decided to re vamp some furniture this weekend. At this moment I am waiting for the paint stripper to do its job. So far the cream chair has at least red, orange, and possibly grey paint hidden below its creamy surface. I am slowly making it down to the woods level and am really hoping that it alright underneath all this paint. Wish me luck and I will keep updating. My goal its to have my set of furniture finished by monday.

motivated in the wrong direction

01 For one, I am surprised that I am already awake. It took me forever to finally go to sleep last night. I listened though Dessa's album Castor the Twin two full times before I actually found sleep. My pen kept meeting the paper of my notebook and words kept forming in my mind. It was one of those nights where I felt inspired to do anything but sleep.

Today I NEED to be productive. Cleaning, Laundry, Grownup business... but all i seem to be inspired to do is to create, decorate and make things.... crafts, food, you name it. I fought against in though and have a load of laundry in the wash and a meeting at 2. 

Todays goal, clean more - craft less... unless all the cleaning is done then I will be crafting to my hearts content.

I want to start up a craft night again with my sisters, we used to do them when I was younger, back before life got busy. It would be nice to slow down again and spend some time together every couple weeks making things and getting to know  each other better. It would also be a nice way to prepare for the holidays, making presents and all.

Time to finish breakfast and make a grocery list.

Darn being a grown up, or atleast trying...

Ink stain - Poem

01

If I were to press my eyelids shut
While the candles flame continued to dance
Clutching the pen between my fingers
Would I awake to a book of hymns
Or just another ink stain mess in my bed

Happy Halloween Portraits!

01

Come see me at Proex in highland to get a free halloween portrait session!  Sheets are buy one get one half off!

Attention Aii Photographers!!!

01 It is official, I have a meeting set up at Ai on Wednesday to fill out my re enrollment paperwork! I am coming back in January.

If anyone has any free time before or after two on Wednesday, I miss everyone and would love to grab coffee or lunch or something! Let me know!

Pumpkin Fall Muffins - Gluten Free

01

So here is how it goes... this recipes base consists of Pamela's baking and pancake mix {here} which I LOVE. This mix works wonderfully! If you didn't know it was gluten free, you would never know the difference... heck I know that they are gluten free and I CANT TELL! So, without further babbling, I give you...

Pumpkin Fall Muffins: Makes 6 Muffins.
1 1/4 cups Pamela's Baking Mix 
1 large egg

1/2 cup Milk
1/2 cup Pumkin pie filling

1/4 cup Udi's Gluten Free Vanilla Granola {here}
1/4 cup Golden Raisins


First preheat the oven to 350 because it wont take long to do the rest of these steps.Mix all ingredients together in large mixing bowl, I found that a wooden spoon worked great for mixing it all up.
Oil muffin tin, Pam's baking spray works wonders and then spoon the batter into the muffin tin and then pop it in the oven. Bake for 25 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean! I let mine cool for five minutes before enjoying. Indulge yourself with a little creamed {here}, or regular, honey on the final product. You won't regret it!

Conversation with my blog...

01 Blog: Where have you been?
Madi: I have been around...
B: Avoiding me again?
M: Yah... sorry about that. I think about you almost every day. I just can never seem to find the right words these days. I will try and do better. I will try and rekindle this thing we once had.
B: That is what you said last time...
M: I know...

Anyways, That amused me way more than it probably should have... I have been a horrible blogger lately. But life is going well. I guess that is better than being amazing at writing in my blog every day and having a mess of a life.

I have been baking more lately. In the last week I have made the following:

Pumpkin Cheesecake Cupcakes {here}

Sweet Apple Baked Butternut Squash {here}

Pumpkin Fall Muffins

In the next week I plan on making:

Sprouted Bread {here}

Rosemary Potato Soup {here}

Butternut Squash Soup

All of these recipes are gluten free which = amazing!

Note: I have been or will be making slight substitutions and changes to each recipe... to fit my budget as well as my taste. They SHOULD work as posted but I haven't tested exactly so no promises.

That's all for now... A tleast it is a post right? :)

Love my girls

01

Yesterday I did some cleaning in my living room, this in combination with the weather has put all three of my kitties in fantastic moods. They have all been laying with me on the couch for over an hour. Even Tigger, who is usually cranky at the other cats for even being close to her.

Tonight I have made the decision to start writing short stories and poems again.they will be shared here, both in progress pieces and final drafts. Make sure you sign up for email updates if youdon't want to miss a moment. Thanks :)

Almost like fall

01

Today is the first day that had the brisk feeling of fall. It was beautiful, and Megan and I spent the afternoon picking pears in my yard. They will take a couple days to ripen, but I am sure they will be tasty. Thanks for the help Megan.

One more night, one more hotel

01

So we have had one more problem and it has left us in Des Moines for the evening... One of the new tires that we had put on the corolla on Wednesday has split. 

We are staying at the Beacon Motel. It is cheap and it works.

This all means that we will both be late to work tomorrow.

Home is only a handful of hours away.

01

Goodbye Nebraska. Goodbye Heath and Priscilla, we look forward to seeing you again in march. Priscilla, you will love MN and never want to leave!

We have had a wonderful trip. Spending time with some of Jake's family and mine. We had lunch with my aunt today at this super tasty natural grill called Blue Planet. Best burger I have had in a while.

Even though our time was short in Columbus, it was well worth the trip. Seeing Heath for the second summer in a row was really nice. I just wish he would move closer so that we could spend more time together.

Well we are on our way to Austin, MN now. I am excited I get to see my neice Ashley and her newborn daughter Madison Rose. I haven't seen Ashley since we were two so today is a big day. She is the one who made me an aunt, and as far as blood goes she is the one who has now made me a great aunt.

Time to continue listening to The Wall

Spare parts

01

So the time now is 10:39. About an hour ago we had the front driver side tire blow out on us. We are now at M&M tire getting an entire new set put on. We had a bit of an adventure getting here. A tire change on the side of the road followed by a couple failed attempts at finding either A. An air pump or B. A place to replace the tires.

The time now is 11:46 and the corolla is now back on the ground with four fresh new tires. We explored the town of Tankawa while we waited. The town had a couple portrait studios and a framing shop that we visited.

And now we are back on the road and six hours from Columbus Nebraska.

Goodmorning Sir Oklahoma

01

We are on our way. Nebraska here we come. Oklahoma, Thanks for the place to stay and the delicious food. We enjoyed your company as well.

We are stating our morning with a bit of Bob Dylan and soon we will be starting our four album set of Pink Floyd. Today is going to be a great day.

Hello Oklahoma City!

01

Today is day one of my trip with Jake. Our flights went well. We arrived at the airport at about 6:15 this morning, his dad transported us there.  Security went smoothly, we got to go through the new body scan machine. I had to be patted down in a couple spots, I think it was from the metal beads in my hair

all went well though. We hurried to grab coffee as soon as we were through security. We had time, but were both in need of the caffeine. We only got about 5 hours of sleep, if even. We ended up having to make a late night trip back to my house to get my mp3 player. We then had 2 hours to wait to board the plane. First plane had some mechanical issues that left us a bit behind on time. We had to run to make our connecting flight in Texas. They waited for us thankfully. I ended up having to check my suitcase because the overhead was all full by the time we boarded. We didn't sit by eachother on the short flight from Texas to Oklahoma. 35 minutes. Our first flight, the long one, we were side by side. Jake was awesome and let me have the window seat on both flights. Well we are in Oklahoma now, and we just went out to eat with his uncle and then to the Oklahoma city bombing memorial. It was a good meal and the memorial was quite the site to see. We will post pictures when we get home. More later.

Hannah at Hidden Falls - Portraits

01 Hannah and I spent a couple hours down at Hidden Falls taking pictures on Monday. Even though I had the misfortune of my purse being stolen, we came out with some great pictures. Here are a couple of my favorites. The rest are up in an album on my facebook.

Is it really only Wednesday?

01 This week as been packed full of ups and downs. I will start with the downs and then finish with the ups so that you can end my post in a better mood. The downside of the week, Monday my purse was stolen. This has led to me needing to deactivate all of my cards, and reorder new ones. Get a new copy of my license. I am also forced to contemplate a new phone, because my phone was also in my purse. This loss is the one that hurts the most. My pictures, my private journal entries that I don't post on my blog and my texts that I had saved. It hurts to loose my images and my words. I have my memories, but if you read my blog often you know that I have a fear of forgetting and these tangible items are my doorway to remembering. I have a list of over 40 items that were in my purse including cards. It may take a while to rebuild. Other than the cards I have replaced, I have replaced the purse itself. I found the same one I had before, marked down to $5. That made me really happy. I got a different wallet than the one I had before. It is yellow and super cute. It can also be used as a simple purse on its own. Those two things are positive. It is also great that it cost me less, half as much, to replace my license than I had expected.

Now onto some positive things. I have been spending more time with Hannah, which is awesome. I really like hanging out with her, we always seem to have fun. Even when It is digging though over 20 garbage cans hoping that whoever stole my purse ditched it in one of them. She is the best.

Today was a lot of fun too, Got to spend the morning with Jake and Emily and some of the family to help celebrate Emily's birthday. I like that I feel so welcome in their family.

That is all for now. Next post will have some pictures :)

Minnehaha Falls with Megan - Portraits

01

 Megan and I went to Minnehaha Falls yesterday, It was gorgeous outside.  We took pictures in a couple different areas and then went  and sat with our feet in the water until our need for food kicked in and we decided to go to the mall. It was a fun day.

Meeting Jamie Camille - Portraits

01 My great niece Jamie Camille is 4 months old now, and today I met her for the first time. She is gorgeous. Not much interest in smiling for me, but she is adorable either way. Here are a couple pictures that I did of her today. Thanks Kelsey for letting me photograph your beautiful daughter.

Battle Creek With Lauren - Portraits

01

 Today was such a beautiful day! Lauren and I spent an hour before work at Battle Creek, a regional park half way between our houses.  I got some beautiful shots of her! I can't wait to see the ones she took of me. 

<3 having photographer friends!